Carly Buxton, PhD

Ever wondered why it’s so hard to get a meeting with someone in the business world? The answer might surprise you – and it has everything to do with how you frame your request.

In academia, we essentially just reach out to other scholars and explain our project, and we’re typically met with the respect of that person helping you (for free). Hey, any interest in being on my panel? You’ll have to pay hundreds of dollars to travel to the conference, and you’ll have to do a ton of free work to prepare, but any interest!? YES. Hey, want to write a chapter for the book I’m editing? You’ll receive no royalties, and only people in our niche will read it. HECK YES. Hey, I’m researching X-topic, and I’d like your thoughts on it–could we have a call next week? ABSOLUTELY.

Asking for people’s time in the business world is totally different. There’s no assumption of the value of “free work” done simply to advance knowledge. Everything is: what’s in it for me?

I forgot that the other day.

I’m currently writing a chapter for a multi-author volume (see? I said yes) on heroes and villains in modern Japan. My chapter focuses on Iva Toguri, who was convicted of treason for her work in propaganda at Radio Tokyo and is remembered in history as “Tokyo Rose.” Toguri featured prominently in my dissertation and book, and it’s been interesting to revisit her story and explore some updates to her legacy in the 10 years that have passed since my dissertation research.

One interesting legacy update: a rock-musical about her life has been written and produced (once in London and again in Tokyo). WOW! I obviously wanted to talk to someone from the creative team, but they’ve all blown me off. I know from reading the newspaper that this happens all the time (they declined our request for comment…) but it’s literally the first time that it’s happened to me as a scholar. It just… didn’t compute! As I said, we historians / researchers typically make these conversations happen, even if it takes a few months to schedule.

I know now what I should have done; it’s what I do in the business world when I want someone’s time.

Frame the request for their time in a way that benefits them, not you. 

Ask yourself: how can you amplify the time this person spends with you? How can you make saying “yes” to you somehow a “flex” for them, that shows their power and extends their reach? Want to talk to a CEO? Ask them to be a guest on your podcast. Want exposure to a creator’s audience? Ask them to collaborate on an Instagram live. Seeking mentorship from a highly regarded denizen in your field? Offer to have them headline at a virtual conference you’re planning. 

The key takeaway? Whether you’re in academia, business, or any other field, remember that everyone values their time (and perhaps scholars should do this a bit more). To increase your chances of landing an important meeting, frame your request as a benefit or “flex” for the other person.

• Offer a platform: Invite them to be a guest on your podcast, webinar, or blog.
• Propose collaboration: Suggest a joint project that leverages both of your strengths.
• Highlight their expertise: Ask them to speak at an event or contribute to a publication.
• Create mutual benefit: Find a way to connect them with your network or resources.
• Show clear value: Explain how the meeting could lead to new opportunities or insights for them.

Remember, it’s not about downplaying your needs, but about aligning them with the other person’s interests. By conquering this approach, you’ll find doors opening that were previously closed. So, the next time you’re reaching out for that crucial meeting, ask yourself: “How can I make this a win for them?” Your success rate might just surprise you.